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Location: Goron City
Link has just entered the decidedly Spartan throne-room of Goron big-boss Darunia who clearly is not in a good mood
Darunia: Who are YOU? When I heard the melody of the Royal Family, I expected that their messenger had arrived.
Link: I AM their messenger. Well. Sort of
Darunia: YOU! You're just a kid! A fairy boy!
Link: Watch it tubby.
Darunia: Is THIS how Darunia, the Big Boss of the Gorons, has come to be treated by his sworn brother, the king?
Link: I'm sure it was nothing personal.
Darunia: We need a hero not a runt. You are half my height and the king sends YOU to help us.
Link: Well actually, Princess Zelda sent me to help you and to save Hyrule in the package.
Darunia: YOU? Save Hyrule!?! Hahahaha! Muhaha!
Link: Do you see anyone else volunteering? If they want to give it a shot, they're welcome to the job.
Darunia: A little boy like you save Hyrule. HAHA! What WAS she thinking?
Link: Have no clue. She had some wacky dream. Hyrule needed saving, and I was the guy to do it. Something about dark clouds and green light, but I wasn't paying attention. She kept yakking and yakking, yah duh, yah duh
Darunia: A premonition?
Link: Yeah. Something like that. I think she overreacted a bit. Seemed to think that the end of the world was coming or something like that
Darunia: That's odd
Link: Well you know Zelda *Mimics Zelda* Oh! I've got a funny feeling in my toe, so now we must walk on our hands!
Darunia: Stupid But the point is that the royal family has disgraced me by sending a little runt like you to help us with a BIG problem.
Link: And that would be?
Darunia: PREHISTORIC CREATURES HAVE INVADE THE DODONGO"S CAVERN!!! AND NOW THERE ARE NO ROCKS TO EAT!!
Link: Do rocks taste good?
Darunia: Very. Are you sure that YOU haven't eaten any? Your head seems to be full of them.
Link: Hey!
Darunia: Only being frank with you.
Link: Well anyways, I can help you with your problem. Yah see. I'm a hero.
Darunia: Go away fairy boy.
Link: Don't call me that!
Darunia: Then GO AWAY!
Link: Can't I help you.
Darunia: Certainly. You can start by leaving me alone.
Link: Fine then
*Link takes out his Ocarina and plays Saria's Song. Darunia begins to dance wildly*
Darunia: OH! BOOGIE BABY! OH YEAH!!!
Link: You're scaring me
Darunia: I'm too sexy for this rock, too sexy for this pebble, too sexy for this stoneOO SEXY!!!
Link: Umm
Darunia: Came on partner! Let's BOOGIE DOWN!
Link: Ummo thanks
*Darunia dance the Macarena. The floor vibrates*
Darunia: This is SLAMMIN Come on! Join me!
Link: That's Ok
*Darunia grabs Link, and they dance a forced and rather ungainly tango across the room. Thankfully, Saria's Song stops soon.*
Darunia: That was great! Wanna try another round?
Link: No, no, and NO!!!
Darunia: Perhaps some other time. Here. I'll give you this Goron's Bracelet for cheering me up. You'll need it to pick bomb flowers.
Link: Thanks, but I don't wear jewelry. At least not bracelets
Darunia: It's a pretty bracelet
Link: Then give it to a girl!
Darunia: There aren't any. Shame. And I'm such a groovy dancer too
Link: Umm
Darunia: Well if you don't want it, good luck GETTING INTO the Dodongo's Cavern without it! HA!
Link: Fine. I'll take itsissy bracelet
*Link makes to leave.*
Darunia: Come back some time and we can do karaoke!
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